5+1 Steps to preserving your sanity in high school

1. Realize that school is like a pressure cooker. Parents put pressure on the administration, administrators put pressure on the teachers, teachers put pressure on the students and in turn students kill each other for that top honor. We all have our own ways of dealing with the stress (killing small animals, posting emo pictures, fornicating with sheep, picking on freshmen, confessing your undying love for a freshmen). Don't care, it's just a game and there are other ways to win.

2. Under no circumstances should you try to have a split personality. Like don't be a complete prep in school and turn around and have the emoest myspace ever complete with the screen name with at least 66 X's. It doesn't work it's hard to be to people at once considering you are only ONE person. Don't do it, it will spill over and WILL give you a headache.

3.5. College is kind of important to most people. I mean think about it. What are you going to do next? Sit around discuss hte good old days? If you don't have a plan then I recomment college. It's the easy way. Yeah, just think about that when you're sitting there contemplating taking study hall, ALC, Individual reading workshop and on your own in the same semester your sophmore year.

4. We are all human thus we all have feelings. Though others try and denouce yours or others, we all bleed red. Don't forget this when your making an absurdly loud comment across the hall. I mean it's one thing to be like "Anindita has flat feet!" But its another thing to be like "Aninidita's feet are that of a duck...".:) Not everyone is cut out to be athlete of the year or valedictorian. You are all special in your own twisted way.

5. Fantasize. No, this does not mean visualizing your math teacher and you after school discussing the merits of the analytic method versus a table for finding limits...and then slowly touch--. No. I mean visualize a goal. Be like, I want to get this grade or I want to have this kind of image and go after it. It may as simple as I want to be more outspoken or I want to talk to that really hot guy whom I'm afraid to talk to. It really sucks to go through life not wanting anything because you are so controlled by whatever. Occasionally going after what you want isn't selfish.

6. Scare Anindita. She makes funny noises when she is shocked.

And if all else fails and you really are comtemplating bringing that gun to your head/school then...DON'T. Here at Jerome we require a 3.8 GPA and 1350 SAT avg if you are going to try and do something like that.

Just don't. Or I will poke you. Most importantly realize that you never had a sanity to begin with. You lost it when you walked through the door to high school.

*note this is a metaphorical sanity.